The Story of our Littlest B part 1
We’re not ashamed to confess Facebook stalking led us to our littlest babe. Stick with me and I’ll explain.
You know you’re guilty of a little FB stalking too! Some days I thank God for Facebook and most days I want to curse it. What’s with all the negativity and trash people air out on it? Is it absolutely necessary to spam your friends list with useless video after video? With every scroll through my feed I can literally feel the energy draining from my body. BLAH!
I digress, to be fair its also responsible for some productive and inspiring moments. The things you can track on "friends" and the information ready for the taking from Facebook is mind blowing.
It was a warm November evening 2014. We had just finalized Birdie, Brax and Brooks' adoption the month before and we were settling into our new life as a household of legal McLennans. When I say settle I use the word loosely, v e r y loosely. How much settling can go on with two toddlers, remodeling our current home at the time and launching a network marketing business that while it turned out to be very lucrative nearly had me calling a psychiatric Dr., not joking? That's neither here nor there point is life was full. We were on cloud nine enjoying the honeymoon period of our new family. The dramatics and uncertainty of the Foster Care system was a thing of the past and we had the certainty of each other fresh within our hearts. But on this particular November evening I picked up my phone while laying in bed to mindlessly scroll, as we do, and I thought to myself, hmm, I wonder what she's up to. She being the most central she of our families lives the last 18 months, the she that was responsible for my overflowing cup. Their biological mother. We'd silently search her page from time to time to keep up to date on her whereabouts and to pull any baby pictures off her profile and tuck them away for the kids to have in there personal files. They have zero baby pictures and we'd like to give them as much as we can when the time comes that they ask for it. So it was on this evening as I came across her public profile that I saw an image that I thought for sure was a mistake. As I looked closer to the details it wasn't until my eyes caught the date marked on this particular photograph that I realized this honeymoon period was about to be over. For as my eyes partook of the information in front of me I knew in my heart we were going to experience this all over again at some point in the distant future because what I saw was the sonogram picture of baby number 4.
My heart sunk and leapt all within the same beat. Leapt because there was a baby and babies are always a blessing and she was choosing to embrace this baby and give it life. Sunk because she had only recently had her parental rights terminated for the three children sleeping in the rooms down the hall from me and she had done nothing to heal herself from what lead us all to this place to begin with. It was my, very valid, concern that this unborn baby would soon encounter the same tragedy my sweet three babies did and it was in that moment that I prayed the first desperate prayer of many like it to come. Lord bless that baby, I pray that her mother can heal and make a go at being a mama to this child but Lord if things go wrong I pray you make that baby to us, somehow someway send that baby to her siblings. And that is the exact prayer I echoed for the 20 months leading up to one of the most life changing text messages I'd ever received....